Personality Tests

One of the side-effects of my depression is that I have this constant need to better understand myself. I'm always trying to gauge whether my thoughts and reactions are "normal" or whether I'm in some sort of unhealthy space. I'm also very uncertain of how others see me. One result of this is that I have become completely addicted to online personality tests. I could sit and take them for hours. Blogthings has a lot of these kinds of tests and there are links to more tests at the top left and bottom right of every test and results page. At least one of the additional tests usually grabs my attention and I end up clicking through to one after another and before I know it, hours have been eaten up by my quest to have a better understanding of my place in the world.

When I was in college, a friend who was in the education department gave me the Myers-Briggs test as part of a testing methodology class that he was taking. I've since taken several abbreviated versions of the test and the results tend to vary only slightly. Sometimes I test as INFP and others I test as ENFP. I have to assume that I'm right on the I/E border and the natural variations in my answers based on whether it's a good day or a bad day end up being the deciding factor.

I was wondering, earlier today, where I'm at right now. I started a new medication today in hopes of dealing with the lethargy, cloudy-headedness, and low energy levels caused by my depression. So far, today has been encouraging. I'm not feeling hyped up or stimulated but I'm not struggling to stay awake while I try to coax Sprout into a nap so that I can go back to bed. Which isn't to say that I wouldn't love it if she'd take a nap. I might even snuggle up next to her to try to get her to doze off. Once she's asleep, though, I'm thinking that it would be nice to spend some time reading something that she didn't choose.

Here's the result of the MB knock-off test that I took this afternoon... It seems pretty accurate. I'm not agitating to get out of the house, but I'm reasonably happy to be out of bed.

You Are An INFP

The Idealist You are creative with a great imagination, living in your own inner world. Open minded and accepting, you strive for harmony in your important relationships. It takes a long time for people to get to know you. You are hesitant to let people get close. But once you care for someone, you do everything you can to help them grow and develop. In love, you tend to have high (and often unrealistic) standards. You are very sensitive. You tend to have intense feelings. At work, you need to do something that expresses your personal values. You would make an excellent writer, psychologist, or artist. How you see yourself: Unselfish, empathetic, and spiritual When other people don't get you, they see you as: Unrealistic, naive, and weak

What's Your Personality Type?

Can Toddlers Be Fat?

I was flipping channels this evening and stumbled across a show on The Learning Channel called "Tubby Toddlers". I will admit that my first impulse was to just scroll past without even reading the description. Frankly, I find that I have little or no respect for TLC's programming anymore. One Week To Save Your Marriage, Crazy Kids Clips, and the endless series of medical freak shows that they seem to think we'll find entertaining are not my idea of enthralling television viewing.

Professor Paul Gately's research on childhood obesity may be quite valid and valuable. One of my greatest fears is that Sprout will struggle with her weight (and the self-worth problems arising from body image issues) as I have done for most of my life. I honestly believed that I was fat and that I needed to loose weight long before I really was. Genetics aren't on Sprout's side on this issue so I'm hoping that we can give her the tools that she needs to tackle the environmental factors so that she's ahead of the game. I love that she is active and energetic...

The thing is, toddlers are developing in so many areas at once. To put toddlers, or any young child, on a weight loss program seems so very, very wrong to me.

TITLE: Florence / Anna Desmond & Co.,LA.
CREATOR: Anna Desmond & Co., photographer.
LOC CALL NUMBER: LOT 3222, no. 38 [P&P]
LOC REPRODUCTION NUMBER: LC-USZC2-5945 (color film copy slide) No known restrictions on publication.
MEDIUM: 1 photographic print : platinum ; 16 x 10
CREATED/PUBLISHED: [1902]

Exploring Self-Esteem

I have a cold. I always feel sorry for myself when I'm sick. Actually, the whole family is sick today. Sprout has been wonderfully energetic and playful all day. Her daddy even went to the grocery store to pick up much needed provisions... I, on the other hand, watched the puppy bowl until Sprout dozed off for a nap, and then cleared off 3 episodes of Law & Order off my DVR while she slept. (Oh, and browsed the internet doing research and finding images for the collage below.)
At the base of this collage is a photo of me, digitally altered to show what I'd look like with a beard. It's a long story, but suffice to say that PCOS (the condition which contributed to my difficulty conceiving and carrying a baby) can lead hirsutism. I lack the courage to stop obsessing about the whiskers on my chin and, more alarmingly, sprouting up around my nipples to tickle my daughter's nose while she nurses... I lack the courage, even, to post the self-portrait without layers of ephemera to obscure it, and hide my hideous secret.