Two padlocks and cobwebs

Two padlocks and cobwebs
Originally uploaded by Linda6769.

Sometimes the locks and obstacles that we put in place are imaginary. Other times they're very real. The thing is, if you go too long without testing them, you may forget which is which.

I was a freshman in high school when I discovered printmaking. I was in college when I finally faced the realization that the solvents and other chemicals involved in printmaking made me seriously ill. I spent a quarter doing monoprints and dry point etchings trying to minimize the contact and prolong the inevitable but in the end I had to admit that printmaking and I were not destined for happily ever after. I resigned myself to the idea that, although I'd always miss it, I'd have to pursue a different medium.

A couple years ago, I started hearing about some of the developments in water based and eco-friendly printing methods. Recently I've been investigating the possiblities that maybe I can return to my high school love...

Wouldn't it be funny, if I brushed away the cobwebs on those obstacles I've been allowing to stop me all these years, and discover that the padlocks were open all along?

2000 Bloggers

Yesterday's cold continues its unwelcome visit with our family. That along with temperatures that topped out at about -1 Fahrenheit kept us inside all day. Sprout's no longer just stuffy and coughing so I'm not sure what we'll be doing tomorrow or later in the week. Of course, tomorrow is supposed to bring snow along with temperatures in the negative single digits, so I'm not sure what I'd want to do anyway. I'm really looking forward to spring. I hope that groundhog was right.
I read about the 2000 bloggers project on another blog several weeks ago. When I started seeing referals from them, I couldn't help going and looking for my picture in the collection. It's amazing to me that I recognized anyone amongst hundreds of 50x60 pixel images. I didn't expect even to recognize myself. It's disorienting to scan so many faces looking for your own, knowing that the image chosen to represent you was outside of your control and could have been any photo on your site. Coming on the heels of a period of intense self-examination, it seems to have a little power to remind me that no one looking at me from the outside really gets much more than a glimpse of me anyway.

Exploring Self-Esteem

I have a cold. I always feel sorry for myself when I'm sick. Actually, the whole family is sick today. Sprout has been wonderfully energetic and playful all day. Her daddy even went to the grocery store to pick up much needed provisions... I, on the other hand, watched the puppy bowl until Sprout dozed off for a nap, and then cleared off 3 episodes of Law & Order off my DVR while she slept. (Oh, and browsed the internet doing research and finding images for the collage below.)
At the base of this collage is a photo of me, digitally altered to show what I'd look like with a beard. It's a long story, but suffice to say that PCOS (the condition which contributed to my difficulty conceiving and carrying a baby) can lead hirsutism. I lack the courage to stop obsessing about the whiskers on my chin and, more alarmingly, sprouting up around my nipples to tickle my daughter's nose while she nurses... I lack the courage, even, to post the self-portrait without layers of ephemera to obscure it, and hide my hideous secret.

The Creation Station

A short time ago, I responded to interview questions from fellow Etsy shop owner Andrea of Powderpuff Creations. Andrea has a blog called The Creation Station where she features the work of crafters who have caught her attention. Andrea has profiled some wonderful craftspeople and I feel honored to be in such great company. Feel free to hop on over and check out the interview. I hope that I didn't manage to come across as a complete goof... I am afraid that the Etsy shop is a little sparse at the moment I'll try to do something about that tomorrow while we watch The Puppy Bowl with Sprout.

When it rains, it pours

And when it pours, it collects in our basement. I have 3 or 4 of these twin chambered vessels bisqued and ready to be glazed when the temperatures improve. I also spent several hours making faces to use for more of my facing forward shawl pins. The faces are now bone dry and ready to be cleaned up (the holes need to be re-drilled) before being bisque fired. I can bisque them in the bench furnace in the garage that I use for raku firing. It'll be a lower bisque than I usually use but still perfectly acceptable.

I can probably have a glaze load ready to go, as soon as Lake Fasimpaur recedes. Wish me luck.

Habit Day 1

In keeping with my thoughts about creating habits, I want to post to this blog an update on my creative efforts every day. I currently have two spaces in my home that are designated as "Studio Space". The first was the space that enticed us to buy this house. The previous owner had run a hair salon from the attached room that was constructed to the side of the house. The constructed space has a separate entrance (which seemed like it would be a good thing if I ever wanted to teach out of my home studio) and is simultaneously apart from and a part of our living space. Since we knew that we wanted to have a child, this was an important consideration.

Over the last few years, that space has been rendered unusable by our use of it as catch-all storage for my art/craft supplies and projects in process. Last spring, I moved many of my tools to the attached screen porch at the back of our house. It was imagined as a temporary move, just to take advantage of the natural light, etc... I got used to using the "indoor" studio as a glorified storage closet and really grew to like the "outdoor" screened porch studio space. This was particularly true when I started working with the torch again. Unfortunately, with temperatures below freezing, an unheated and uninsulated studio is just not a comfortable place to be. We've been very fortunate that the winter has been so mild and that my access to the studio hasn't been much limited until now.

What I'm getting at is, although I really want to post the results of my creative efforts in the studio, I'm too much of a wimp to go out there. Instead, I decided to spend a little time looking at the forms that I make all the time in a different way and a different context. The digital collage above is the results of today's efforts.

Sprout wants me to make a puppet as a birthday present for the 2nd birthday of a family friend. If everything goes well, maybe I'll get it done in time to photograph it before we're on our way out the door. I'm not making any promises, my educated guess is that I'll be jabbing myself in the fingers with a felting needle as I try to finish the puppet in the car on the way to the birthday party on Saturday. Wish me luck.

Creating Habits

I found a thought provoking post on a new blog through a comment in a thread over at the Bead Circle. Essentially, the post suggests that since studies have suggested that doing something for 28 days will create a habit, and February generally has 28 days, February would be the perfect month to cultivate a new habit in your life. It seems like a brilliant idea and one which I'm thinking that I would like to steal.

I have several habits which I'd like to develop. I need to be more diligent about posting new items to my Etsy shop. I have puppets that I've been meaning to post for weeks and just can't seem to get my ducks in a row...

I'd like to make writing a more consistent part of my life. Whether it's updating my blog, writing stories/fiction for my own enjoyment, writing tutorials for my website, or writing articles to submit for publication, I need to write more.

I need to make more time to get into the studio. I recently went through some old image files and found images of pieces that I had auctioned at JustBeads.com. There were a lot of discontinued styles and types of pieces. I know why some items were abandoned. The mermaids and winged goddesses don't travel or store well, their wings or tails tend to chip or break. On the other hand, I love the donut vessels like the one pictured above*. They're time consuming and there are a lot of steps to make them. It's difficult with Sprout in my life to get the timing right on any of the pieces that I make that use thrown and handbuilt components. I'd like to make the time to re-visit some of the forms that challenge me and make me stretch my artistic wings.

The Beads-of-Clay yahoo!group is having another bead swap. (If you didn't look at the video in my earlier post, I strongly recommend it... I REALLY want to learn how to do that!!!) At last count, there were about 35 people involved in the swap. I'm looking forward to it. I haven't really decided what I'm making but it will be fun for me to make a series of pieces that I won't be photographing, scanning, or listing anywhere.

And speaking of photographing and listing, I need to get moving on those puppets.

*I'll probably be sprinkling some of those archive images into the blog. I like having pictures with the posts and looking back at some of these 3 and 4 year old pieces, I have to admit that I kinda like them. The donut, for example, was made in 2003.

Sprout's Obsession

Included in the packages from Germany with the other treats that my sister sent for the holidays this year were several boxes of Kinder Eggs for Sprout. (Well, Sprout and mama if we're being completely honest... Sprout gets the chocolate, mama gets the toy...) Having spent a significant portion of our childhood in Europe, Kinder Eggs hold a special place in the hearts of myself and many others.

I remember reading somewhere, about the same time that the FDA banned the eggs in the US, that some engineering or design programs use Kinder Eggs as an instructional device. Some of the toys contained inside Kinder Eggs are rather complicated and involved. The eggs, and the toys inside, are manufactured and sold in many countries with very diverse languages. Adding to the difficulty, the toys must fit inside a rather small plastic capsule inside the chocolate egg. This often means breaking a complicated toy into quite a few small parts which must be assembled by the recipient no matter where they live or what language they speak. The instructions must fit inside the plastic capsule with the toy, so if they're too complicated or require translation, it cuts into the space available for the toy. As a consequence, the instructions are usually illustrated and sometimes puzzling. (Think IKEA assembly instructions...) The point being, I love Kinder Eggs and try to justify that love with admiration of the design accomplishments and tech writing genius represented by the toy surprises. (Like most other Kinder Egg enthusiasts, I almost want to cry when I open that little capsule and find a figurine instead of a wonderful puzzle of a toy.)

The unfortunate down side of the current supply of Kinder Eggs in the house is that my days are punctuated by repeated two word pleas, screams, whines and demands for "Chocolate Egg"... Sprout seems to think that repetition is the key to getting what she wants. If I don't immediately acquiesce, she experiments with changes of inflection and volume. She sounds a little like a star-struck theatrical amateur experimenting with the verbal inflection of a line of dialog trying to find just the right delivery. It would be funny and cute if it weren't so damned anoying.

Eye Candy

Just after Christmas, I got a box of beads very similar to those shown in the video above. The beads were the results of a bead swap amongst the members of the Beads of Clay Yahoo!Group. There are some amazing beadmakers in this community and some of the newer members may well prove to be the the bright stars on the horizon of the artisan ceramic bead world. (The video was made by Natalie of NKP Designs.)

As for myself, I'm not getting as much done in the studio as I'd like. Right now, the depression seems to be a bit worse than it's been, to the extent that I spent most of Sunday in bed with a headache. Today I sent Sprout to her swim lesson with her daddy so that I could stay home. It's the first class that I've missed but I just couldn't face going out of the house or out into the world after the pool with wet hair...

You Can't Catch Me, I'm A Girl!

Not long before Christmas, Sprout watched one of several episodes of Between The Lions featuring the story of The Gingerbread Man. As chance would have it, Sprout saw that episode 2 or 3 times in the course of a couple of days and it made a pretty big impression. The first indication that I had of the exact nature of my daughter's new obsession with the gingerbread man was during a visit to a pet store where she broke free of my grasp and ran down one of the isles looking back over her shoulder calling, "You can't catch me, I'm the gingerbread man." This new freedom of hers made her giddy. When it was time to get dressed in the mornings, or time to change into her sleeper at night, she would wriggle free and run around in circles calling, "Can't catch me, I'm the gingerbread man."

Last weekend, my aunt came for a long overdue visit. While here, she was treated to Sprout's wild evasive maneuvers and her gingerbread man chorus. My aunt laughed and said, "Wouldn't that be 'the gingerbread GIRL'? After all, you are a girl." Sprout thought about it for a moment and ever since her calls back to us as she runs away have been "You can't catch me, I'm a girl!"

I really like this new battle cry. It appeals to the feminist in me. (The part of me that dressed her as Rosie the Riveter for Halloween when she was a year old...) I hope that she always feels that being a girl gives her an advantage. I want her to feel valued and special and powerful and vital and invincible.

Tonight, as I scooped her up in mid-stride and planted a kiss on her naked belly, I laughed and said, "Yes, baby mine, but you've forgotten something important. Mama's a girl, too!"